Sickly Pancake Revelations and a Hope for the Future

I sat at the worn family table eating my pancakes. 

They were a couple of pancakes from the wonderful Birds Eye chocolate chip frozen packet because pancakes are the one thing I definitely can not cook. I covered it in sugar, golden syrup and lemon juice, just like I had covered the pancakes I had as a kid. 

It smelt sweet. Sickly sweet. 

Chaos unfolded around me. My toddler decided it was the perfect time to poop his pants after days of pooping on the potty. My four year old ran around joyously but noisily. My husband paced the floor on the phone. 

My mind cast back to my childhood days. Pancake day. 

Instead of having pancakes for breakfast, lunch or pudding, we had them as our dinner. It's only now I've grown up and gone into the big wide world that I realise that solely having pancakes as your dinner is not standard. 

I used to love them, then I went through a phase of dreading pancake day because it was all so sickly. For a dinner. My sister flat out refused the dinner. I'm not even sure what she did eat instead but I think towards my teenage years I used to be envious of her choice to not participate in pancake day. I'm sure she has delightful pancakes now, but bless my Dad, the dinner pancakes soon got turned down by myself too. I remember my Dad did attempt the odd flip or two back in the day, as well. His efforts did not go unnoticed.  

Pancake memories. They seem so distant now. How my childhood flew. How my teenage years rushed by. How it all went by in the blink of an eye. 

And here I suddenly was, sat eating my own pancake on pancake day. How I wish I could enjoy another sickly pancake day from my childhood. I miss so much of my childhood now I have children off my own. I see how important and beautiful these memories are. I treasure them so so much now. 

When I was younger, I was told to make the most of things as I went through my stages. People would tell me to enjoy my school days, because things would never be as fun, social or simple after. I was told to enjoy university, because it would be over in the blink of an eye and there would be no excuse to live off of noodles after. I was told to enjoy my pregnancy, because silence and calm would be rare encounters afterward. I was told to enjoy my children whilst they were babies and toddlers because they grow too quickly. They do. They grow far too quickly, just like I have. 

I have now turned 27. This baffles me. I feel so young still, yet so old. How has it been 10 years since I got my provisional drivers license? How has it been 10 years since I was filling in my UCAS. How has it been 20 years since SMTV: Live graced our screens? How has it been over 10 years since I indulged in one of my Dad's pancakes for pancake day? Time certainly does fly when you're having fun. I nearly have a five year old. That is nearly five of our own new traditional pancake days. 

It all becomes so clear, all of the times I would roll my eyes when people used to tell me to make the most of things because time goes quickly and things are never the same- all of those times they were right. So, I will be telling my Sons now to make the most of simple childhood days. I will be embracing life and time to the full now, making sure I appreciate the simple times and creating fun new traditions. 

So in homage to my childhood pancakes, I topped it just like I used to. And I embraced the chaos of my own family life. I just hope that we can continue to make traditions in our own kind of messy perfect way. 

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